Congratulations, you survived the end of the world. That means you’re very capable, pretty clever, or extremely lucky. Regardless of how you survived, not dying is just the beginning, and life after the apocalypse is not going to be easy. Be prepared for the end of the world as we know it and the post-apocalypse with Wasteland Hacks.
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Home Field Advantage
Scavenging may have replaced sports as the national pastime, but that doesn’t mean you should skip the stadium all together. It could still be a good source of materials for thriving in the apocalypse. So, let’s take a look at the football stadium. Should you loot it or leave it?
Luxury Suites
Top shelf booze, leather couches, and a killer vantage point for a sniper’s nest, there are worse places to ride out the apocalypse.
Concession Stands
Filled with endless cans of cheese, buckets of pickles and cans of beer shaped like bottles for some reason, it’s worth stopping by the concession stands even if they’re out of souvenir soft serve ice cream helmets.
Locker Rooms
Players aren’t coming back, but their lockers still hold towels, pads and protective gear, and protein powder by the barrels. And short of a professional wrestling school, there is no better place to find HGH and steroids.
Trainer’s Room
From concussions to groin pulls, team medics dealt with it all. These rooms are going to be filled with bandages, braces, splints. Don’t forget to check the locked cabinets and grab everything ending “-caine.”
Mascot Costume
Is it practical? Not really. Is it dignified? Absolutely not. But a full-body mascot suit offers warmth, anonymity, and a possible advantage when it comes to psychological warfare.
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It used to be where dreams were made and overpriced snacks were sold. Now it’s just another ruin. But one with useful gear, lots of drugs (medical and illicit), and maybe a beer or two. Loot it. And if the scoreboard still works, put your name at the top.
Have a great apocalypse.
Ben
2 comments
And if you cut the tops off balls, they can be used as waterproof containers for hauling and storing things. And football helmets would cut down on enemy head bashing. Shoulder pads would make you look bigger and more imposing. The protective junk holders could prove handy for you guys in a battle, as they wold prevent clutching, moaning, and falling to the floor. Because face it guys- that’s the fastest way to take you out of the equation. You could use the white chalk stuff to mark trails to the opposing guys camps and just wait for someone else to take them out because they are easy to find. If it is a covered stadium, you could just set up camp inside. It would be a formidable fortress with a lot of seats to hide behind for an ambush.
Genius! 😂 Hopefully no SSLBs (supersmart linebackers) there that will run you down.!